“One girl I met up with was on house arrest and ‘forgot’ to tell me.” via GIPHY 7. That’s cool, I thought, I can be friends with nice people that aren’t witty. A few weeks in, he told me I was almost perfect, except my upper arms were fat. “I had been texting this girl for a good three weeks, and we finally decided to go out on a date.
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The conversation was terrible, but I noticed she was taking the chicken fingers and ripping them up in her hands and putting the breading in her huge purse. She smiled and said, ‘Oh, I’m just feeding Sammy,’ and pulled out a fat chinchilla from her purse. Turns out I was on a date with the guy’s roommate.” 3.
She plopped the thing in the middle of the table, and it just kinda chilled out. “I got to know a nice gal for a few weeks before we decided to meet up for a hiking date.
I played with the chinchilla a bit, and she kinda got mad at me for playing with it and back in the purse it went.” via GIPHY 2. We got along okay, the conversation went well, and in the course of the date, he asked me about bad dates I’ve been on. She only wanted to communicate through email or the dating site – which I thought was odd but just went with it. She’s married and her husband is a jealous, gun-collecting hunter type who she’s thinking about leaving.” via GIPHY 4. Eventually he asked if I’d like to see his flat, and I said yes.
He had loads of swords and machetes on the wall and decided to hold one to my throat to show me how incredibly strong they were.” 5.
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